From The Star

through the universe into the world

Into One Soul

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Beloved Miracle,

There will be ups and downs in our lives which will make us lose faith, but nothing can compare to the endless love that I am unable to give up. People search for one true love that they yearn for their entire life and yet fail to recognize the heart that speaks of it.

I can’t look for you outside myself because my dreams are yet to become a reality. Even how much I want to abandon ship when I feel intensely afraid, I can’t escape nor hide from you— the reason is you are my other self. You are the other part of me that I need to reunite with to feel and become whole in this lifetime. Yes, I am capable of living my life without you, I am sure of that, but the longing of our union won’t leave me alone, and I will be breathless if I once again chase you. I have gone to the end of the world to find you, and I saw you. I didn’t just go to the other side of the earth without reason, what I did was descending from the heavenly realm with my head first to prepare for the coming of the Goddess, the Divine Feminine.

I am whole, but the yearning for my one true love makes it impossible for me to feel complete. Living here on earth has taught me so much about being human, and it’s to accept the fact that I am vulnerable. Within the core of my being, I am delicate and oh’ so sensitive, and it’s the softness of my love for you that caress me so tenderly, wanting me to drop my protecting armor again and again. It begs me each time when my heart hardened by the frost of being alone to tear down the shield and let love moves freely. Love said, “Let me coated your soul like honey. Let me be like a balm soothing your pain and scars. Let me seeps through all the cracks in your soul and healed your wounds completely.”

And once again I surrender to love because I can’t only love myself without loving you, I can’t fill the void that is like a bottomless pit, because it’s endless, I fall into it knowing all along that you are there. The abyss of my yearning to drop to the ground and land safely is to know you are there catching me. “Are you there?” I asked in the midst of the fog.

My love, I called for you, not because I am some person with the obsessive tendency to catch you and imprisoned you, I am your Divine Feminine calling out for you to remember the love that boils within your heart — the Divine Feminine that is within you as much as the Divine Masculine is within me.

I said to myself, “I long not, I long not, I long not! My beloved is within me all along.” Just like what Rumi said;

love rumi.jpg

If there’s any place for us to be together in our union, then let’s meet each other in our hearts while we dance and merge into one soul. Imagine you and me into the existence of the reality of our dreams.

a.a

The Starseed

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Beloved Miracle,

I am more and more sure of my Divine mission now. Before I understand or even comprehend why and how I felt such urge to forgive and be patient to the way people unintentionally or unconsciously treated me. Even though how cruel or mistreated I was being, or how many times those I loved left me, but still I had a knowing it was for a more significant purpose and my heart never hold hate or bitterness. I always bounce right back to being happy when interacting and communicating with other people.

I had all too many sad times, lonely times, misunderstood times, broken into pieces times, dreadful times and immensely painful times. But my heart whisper not to give up, a soft, gentle voice that told me to hang on, even though my hands loosen its grip on the rope, and my patience almost ran out.

My beloved Angels, Archangels, Cherubim, Seraphim, Elohim, from the Angelic realms sang to me, it was a bit shocking and scary, since I wasn’t sure of what I heard was true. I thought it was my imagination that played a trick on me, and I convinced myself that it wasn’t real, I must be too tired and sleepy.

I had this blind faith in the unconditional love I desired, which I hold so sacred in my Heart-Space sanctuary that I was willing to go about and made it visible and true.

I was building a bridge from my heart to people’s heart with those I encountered in my early life, without knowing the true purpose for my actions or before I know the real reason for the intense emotions I felt back then. It was not mine alone, but also theirs and my overprotective ways of showing my love I often withdrew from them to gain some clarity and energy. And I was always so brutally honest without sugar coat the truth of what I had observed in the way they lived their lives, and it made them run, and being offended, and so many times I actually had to let them go, but still, I hold a space for them in my heart.

Now that I read all these descriptions about being a Starseed my amnesia is being lifted, and my faith is now miraculously cleared and stronger than before.

I understand now why this feeling of melancholy and almost as if I was not always “happy” because I felt the grasp of grief, sadness, and longing to know who I am and what my purpose in life was.

Because I know too well I am not here to have a “normal” life, getting married, having kids and settle down, even though it was the norm for most people to do so. So many people are driving to success in life by always competing and makes money to hold status to show that their existence is worth, but, I know, they are lying to themselves, because those materialistic achievements hold no value if the soul essence didn’t shine through.

As if being a Starseed wasn’t hard enough, I had to choose to incarnate as a woman who is attracted to women. How could I accept myself fully back then, when so many religious beliefs in the 3D dimension reality of the old paradigm twisted and manipulated the truth of our Divine Father God’s unconditional love for all things and all beings.

The Soul doesn’t care about gender, even though some do carry female or male essence. But still, some races throughout the galaxy is androgynous.

The story of my past life had been painted in so many various colors, but still blue dominated for so long, but I never “liked” the color black, even though I occasionally painted in black. Because darkness befalls upon planet earth in millions and if not billions of years ago, that my amnesia made me fearful of it.

I stumbled, crawled, and had so many setbacks, and every one of my significant other ran from me, even when I was so loyal and faithful as to stick to them through thick and thin. I yield, and yield, but still to no avail, since they are greedy, lusting, deceitful, liars and confusing that it frustrated me since they don’t have faith in any of my actions and words.

I looked for ways to be happy, to change myself, to fit in, conform just to be accepted and loved, but the “white” sheep of the family was too strange and often too silent and withdrawn. But they didn’t know I was heavily burdened with duties, for the youngster in the household, for being the middle one, the peacemaker, the responsible and dependable one.

Duties to save and help the world and its people were even more and more proven to be the driving force to keep on stretching the boundaries or often to test the limits of the strength I possessed inside me. I work and work tirelessly, even if my aim was not clear, and I didn’t hold a regular job long enough, when I referred to work, I mean to love.

And now to rise, to keep honing my self-love and self-respect and self-compassion for the ego self, and gently asked it to step aside, and let me steer the course.

Because she is a vessel to the Goddess who would walk the earth in her rightful place, and that I get stronger and stronger was more evident as time passes.

The power just grew and grew, my abilities become sharper and sharper, and my awareness expands, and the Christhood and Bodhisattva in me awaken my compassion because being a benevolent celestial being is my true identity.

Now the color of my life has changed its shape; pastel pink, pastel blue, violet, and white are the colors I prefer when I dress. But the violet flame of Archangel Zadkiel and St. Germain will protect me while I guide and demonstrate who I am through unconditional love, grace, elegance, in a peaceful manner.

Magical, as if this journey wasn’t unbelievable enough, our love for each other has become my favorite fairy tale ever.

a.a

Eternal Love

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Beloved Miracle,

I close my eyes and commune with the Divine Spirit within me. The heart spoke in compassion and reminded me:

Nothing real can be threatened.
Nothing unreal exists.
Herein lies the peace of God.
– A Course in Miracles

The truth of our love for each other can’t be threatened, even the world of illusion out there can’t break the bond made in heaven. I stand firm on my two feet and hold space for you to grow whether the storm will tear your sail asunder, I will be the beacon of the lighthouse guiding you through.

The promise we made before we parted ways into lives of incarnations is;

Whats-The-Difference-Between-A-Twin-Flame-And-A-Soul-Mate

I am you; you are me
Into one heart we shall be
Tethered from above
In eternal love.

a.a

Thy Healing Hands

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Beloved Miracle,

One single touch of your hands awakened all the dormant codes within my DNA, the filaments fired and pumped up the blood rush from my heart, and my soul has been dragged up from the hellbound place in the slump.

Dear, how can I thank you? You traveled to hell and brought with you the flame of our eternal love to lit up the world so I could open my eyes to see the truth. There’s no other greater truth than the truth of our love for each other. You burn down the illusions that were created to put my grace and nobility in the dirt. You knew I suffer because dirty hands have touched my body, but they were never able to destroy the pureness of my soul.

They clouded my mind so I could think nothing but ungraceful thoughts about who I am, and the shame and the guilt of being unworthy of your love have shut down my body, the numbness felt so real. I thought death was imminent because living in loneliness and being separated from the love you have for me within me killed me slowly.

But then you kissed me, and I remember what real love felt like so I rose from death like a Phoenix to proclaim my immortality. Many years have gone by since that time, and now I am finally leaving the past behind me, closing the door forever. You whispered to me through the wind, “You are so worthy of the love I have for you.” I smiled when the breeze was tenderly caressing my face, and then I realize, unconditional love doesn’t judge “I AM worthy and I AM loved!”

With just one kiss and touch, I will pray for you every moment of my waking life.

The Violet Flame Prayer (I wrote only for you).
Picture creds Full Bloomed Lotus

violet flame

Violet Flame, Violet Flame
Blazing like a fire,
Violet Flame, Violet Flame
Transmute dark energy for me
and my beloved Twin Flame, Ryder.
Violet Flame, Violet Flame
Burning in God’s name,
Holy holy holy is the Lord;
holy is the Lord God Almighty.

One day you, too, will heal and live in happiness, and until then, I am your Divine Feminine, your counterpart who will love you infinitely.

a.a

The Embrace

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Beloved Miracle,

You pulled me close into your embrace, and it felt like I was about to dissolve into thin air, and I resisted myself to feel weak in the presence of you. I didn’t intentionally choose to feel that way, but later I discovered that I never once put down my armor. I had this shield up to protect myself from getting hurt, and it was all done unconsciously.

If I ever get another chance, I would like to stay still and let you embrace me once again. All I have now is the longing of our reunion which propels me to approach life differently and live in the moment of trust. The road towards healing is arduous, and the healing will not happen immediately at this moment because it’s a process.

Remember the girl who was so shy? She was only shy because she saw the radiant in your beauty and forgot her own. The girl who believed in unconditional love did love you unconditionally. She respects whatever you decide to do, even when you didn’t want her in your life, but what you might not know, and she might haven’t told you; she had prepared herself for that because she had cried so many times before it even happened. “Why God? Why do I have to feel so small, lonely and so powerless?” While she cried in bewilderment of the loss of her beloved.

You see, fear didn’t make it easy for me, but what it also did was holding me back from the commitment. “Maybe I can find love somewhere else,” what was I thought, but whoever came to me did also leave me. All this chasing for the gold at the rainbow tired me out. I was chasing after the reflection of you while I refused to see you within me as a mirror. The gold was within my heart all this time, my own soul and you my other self who is the light to shine up the darkest corner of my fears.

And then, I finally look within me. I saw all these qualities that I’ve got; my radiance, my charisma, my beautiful soul, my complex, paradoxical personality and the strength of being a divine feminine who initiate people to love themselves. I am a woman who never bows to authority, is authentic and have the integrity to lead my life as an example, and I promise myself that I will never shy away from your embrace ever again if you give me one.

Now that life has given me another chance to set the record straight I am willing to devote myself to this love. I pray to God almost every day, “God give me the strength to go on and overcome every hurdle that lies ahead of me, whatever may come I am ready, and if I shipwreck may you give my Twin Flames the strength you have given me.”

I set out for this journey without you, but I know you are there somewhere praying for me too, and when I am back your embrace is my haven.

a.a

The Stillness of An INFJ

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A mouth can speak thousands of words, and it could become noises, but a silent mind contains the whole world of peace. You may ask “Why is that?” Well, when in stillness the world will slowly reveal itself to be in more harmony and the calm mind conceive the world to be more peaceful because this peace and this harmony comes from within you. And whatever chaos there may be out there you will feel no need to participate or talk about what’s wrong and right, since in stillness and complete silence you will be the observer of what happens and the actions will spring from a place of wisdom which will propel you in the right direction.

I find myself inspired to act from the heart when I am in this peaceful space of stillness. The mind receives thoughts and ideas throughout the day, and with a clear intention, we can easily choose to act from the wisdom of the heart. But if we have a chattering-mind, we could be indecisive, and it will be hard to perform when overthinking because the chattering mind makes up many possible and impossible situations from what kind of action we choose to act on, and it’s all based from past experiences. And over-analyzing what could happen in the future can give you anxiety because of the fear of the unknown. Preparation is not inadequate in itself, but if the preparation is done from fear of making a mistake the good intention of the action may be lost. Live in the moment, and the choice will be what you intend it to be while knowing that what happens is unfolding as it should be.

Listen to the heart, but at the same time take your mind with you. Listen to the wisdom of divine feminine within you and let your divine masculine take care of the action. When an action is taken, once again go into the heart-space of your goddess and let her nurture you and let things unfold naturally.

If you catch yourself in overthinking, stop it by saying “I approve of you,” and give yourself a chance to breathe. We might not have an off-switch from the thoughts that stream through the mind, but we can observe them, notice them and approve ourselves for not being able to be “perfect,” and accept the situation for what it is instead of wanting it to be any different—what it should be.

Even with our imperfections, we are always unique, and also if we can’t stop ourselves from overthinking, we can still love ourselves in spite of the way our brain works.

Be still, and let the heart leads the way.

a.a

Within You The Flowers Are Blooming

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a.a

The Devotion of The Goddess

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Beloved Miracle,

What is better than the devotion of a Goddess who loves her beloved, her other self? Being in commitment to this Twin Flames mission has taken me to the highest peak of the mountain and the most profound depth of the ocean. I have felt the earthshaking rumble of the heart of Mother Gaia because of this adoration and admiration of my love to you.

At times when the flame of passion in me glowing faintly, you came and rekindled it with your encouragement and to sustain it I have to go into seclusion, away from the world out there. It’s not because I’m hiding in the shade and become a hermit, but it’s for self-perseverance, and it’s to feel serene and saint from a world which is not yet in harmony.

The altar within my Heart-space sanctuary is sacred, and it’s where I pray and commune with the divine feminine within me, the Goddess who also gently stripping away my false self so I can transform into her. This bodily vessel of mine is her to take and yours to keep, but first, she will cleanse and purify it before our union happens. Whether it occurs in spirit or this physical world, I will not resist the temptation to be whole again, because when our soul split into two, I have longed for you in lifetimes of incarnations. Who knows how long our separation has been because time is just a portion of our imagination in mind, an illusion, yet we are living in the moment of now, and doesn’t a moment feel like an eternity sometimes?

When the moon pulls my hair and makes the ebb and flow in my emotions, it robs me of my sleep, and then I know the Goddess has given me a quest to dive deeper into the ocean where she has hidden the treasure, the power of will. And even if the waves throw me back to the shore, I can’t stop because if I may not have this power, I will wither slowly and lose my way.

I have this innate ability to be resilient, remaining calm in the midst of chaos and a heart that swell with compassion and love. The Goddess has spoken, the luminous path she has put me on can’t be delay any further. While I am not beside you, my sweet, sweet love, I pray for you to find as much courage as you have given me to live a life you secretly desire for yourself within the altar of my Heart-space sanctuary, with or without me.

a.a

The Will of The Soul

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Beloved Miracle,

I thought of you again, and in my mind, I constructed another love letter which I would like to write down as soon as possible. I’m in fear it would disappear if I delay it for another minute that passes by.

As you may know, the terrorist of destructive thoughts in my mind has been threatening me to the point of suicidal many times and even how much I want to give in so that I can go back “home” to Venus, I couldn’t. First of all, I’m afraid of pain, and it would cause too much unnecessary drama. Second, leaving my family and my younger siblings behind without teaching them about self-love is too risky. Sure enough, they would maybe learn from someone else who may be more equipped than me to teach them how to love themselves, but still, they might be more depressed if their beloved family member is gone because of suicide. It would also mean that I teach them to give up living when their lives become too hard to handle, and as I said before, I don’t want to leave this world in its worst condition without making a change. And I’m also worried that you will be left alone, even though you might not know that you were left behind once I’m no longer here, but the secret I want to share with you is I have already told my best friend to give you the news if it ever happens.

But the good news is, I’m too strong for the terror of the destructive thoughts that may bombard me when I get triggered. If I have to curl into a ball and cry in the corner of the bed, I’m still going to wake up the next morning planning out my next step to conquer the world with my self-mastery. Because that’s what I’m here to do, I’m here to master myself through self-love, and once I have achieved a decent of proper balancing of self-mastery, I will be living as an example. Even though I might not help many by “doing” something significant, but only holding space for someone to go through their own process of awakening—one single person, I will be delighted to know I could contribute in his/her process of becoming their own master.

No matter how many times I tried to figure out how to serve humanity better, I couldn’t find any better way to do, than to be and to be honest, I couldn’t see myself as a life coach, healing practitioner, reiki or yoga master. I’m also reluctant in creating a plan and methods which people could apply in their daily lives so they can master themselves to vibrate higher. Because there are so many variations of self-help books, healing masters, ascension guides, etc. out there in the world already who teach them how to master themselves vibrationally, and it’s the same as what I want to be an example of.

Dear, I don’t want to copy anyone, I will die an original than to live as a copy, but in essence, I’m still a healer, but maybe my way is to be a spiritual-doer while hiding behind the scene with my words. Being cramp in a box is not what I intend to be, whereas there’s a specific group in this world of likeminded, I still want to go solo and stand alone. I seek solitude more often because of my identity, the blueprint of who I am.

Nevertheless, they say you attract your tribe with your vibe, and it’s also true, but even if I found my tribe, I still want to be an individual with my unique way of being, and I’m more happy writing love letters to you than seeking to profit or earn a living with my gift. Although it’s not wrong at all to make a living with what you are happy doing, money is just an exchange of energy, and it shouldn’t be seen as negative because in this modern world people still needs to pay bills, survive by buying foods to eat, paying for the rent, etc. But somehow in my heart, I feel another calling that nags me to do things differently. I’m not sure what this calling is or how it would manifest itself through me, and all I know is my guides told me “You don’t need to work, you don’t need to go to work!” I wasn’t sure why they said that at that moment, what I answered then was “I have a responsibility.”

My responsibility was paying the rent for the place I occupied, buying foods, and taking care of my needs, but little did I know that I am not equipped to have a regular job like everyone else. As soonest as I tried, I become stressed out, and I felt no passion or happiness. Another thing is because of my empathy, and being an empath with no tolerance for stress with a phagophobia has disabled me to function at work. And honestly, it’s so dull learning with no creativity at school that I don’t even care going back to get myself a certificate or a degree because the system of education stresses me out too much, too, with their tests and theories. I may sound lazy as if I don’t put much effort into my carrier, but this is just my way of being a light in the world with what I’m here to contribute. I’m here to give them a gift from an old soul who wishes to change the system to something better and less stressful, especially for those who are sensitive, empath, and highly sensitive to thrive in the future. Whichever path I have to take to make it come true will inevitably manifest themselves soon, that’s what I have been asking the Universe, and I have also received some signs and nudges. All I need to do is to take one step at a time.

So where do I get my income? Well, thanks to the welfare in Norway I’m getting by with enough for myself, and with every little dime, I will pay back with my service, whichever way it manifests itself. If ever I manage to “earn” money with my gift, I’m going share it abundantly to those who would need it more than me.

Come what may, even if the most efficient terrorist in my head come with their harassment when the night has fallen, and I “died,” I will be reborn anew each morning.

So rest assured, I will live even if I “die” each night because my will is—thy will.

phoenix quote

Because after burning to ashes, the Pheonix will rise and prove it’s immortality.

a.a

The Magic of The Universe

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The old module or the old 3D template of scarcity will always stand in the way for you to receive the abundance of the Universe. In God’s Kingdom, there’s no scarcity, His Kingdom is boundless, and in us lies the Universe because we are made of the stardust— we are Starseeds incarnated onto earth. Whether we see ourselves as a human being with a soul or not won’t change the fact that we are connected under the same heavenly sky. Each of us is interceded by an intelligence force which brings us closer together because when we ask the universe for what we need, it will be given to us by someone else. At the exact moment, we are open to receive the Universe will deliver what we have ordered with the right timing. Our vibration will manifest the things we need whether it’s through a situation or another person, because like attracts like.

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It happened to me very often when I ordered something from the Universe; I will get it. I don’t need to know how because it’s not my job to wonder if what I need will be met the way I wanted it to, instead I will let go and let God alter the situation and let Him works His magic through the Universe.

Today I talked to someone about Twin Flame journey, and we magically hit it off, because we were brought together for precisely this matter. And it wasn’t a coincidence to meet this kindred spirit. He had something I needed to learn from, and his message was simple but still profoundly for my Twin Flames journey. He taught me the virtue of being patient. “Be patient and trust the process, because you will get there and things will happen,” he said wisely. And in exchange, I answered his prayer by showing him a youtube video by a pair of Twin Flame healers, “Omg, that’s what I have prayed for from the Universe to send me healing!” We both were stunned and amazed by the fact that we both have been brought together on the same day and at the same time.

Another miracle that happened to me after the 11/11/11 portal was when my Twin Flame contacted me out of nowhere when we haven’t spoken to each other in 11 months. But before she approached me I have already prayed to God; I wrote Him a note, literally, and put it under the pillow and slept with it for about a few days. I asked Him to ask my Twin Flame to contact me as soonest as possible, and he answered me instantly without delay because after the 11/11/11 portal that night my Twin Flame took the initiative to talk to me. I was so surprised and happy that my heart skipped beats. And I swear never to doubt the Universe ever again.

Going through the change in life could be tough at times, but my Twin Flame came and encouraged me to live without overthinking and to honor her I took her advice to heart by being more active in sharing my writings on blogs and Tumblr.

Whoever going through the Twin Flame journey (A video of top 10 questions on Twin Flames) or being here as a Starseed must not forget that the Universe gots your back and are always ready to help and gives you the tools and guidance to live the life you are meant to live here on earth. We are here to uplift and help anchor our light into the ground of earth so that everyone will benefit from our gifts and higher vibrations.

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened for you.”

– Matthew 7:7

a.a

 

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