I Found Peace In Breathing
Time pushes me to breathe, inhale and exhale with no desire. I hoped so much and wanted more than I get, but whatever I needed then, was fulfilled in a way I knew not would be possible today.
Someone asked me, “Do you feel like you are doing something meaningful in your daily life?”
With a smirk on my face, I answered, “I don’t think of what I do in my everyday life to be meaningful. If I have to look for ways to do things with meaning then I have to strive, and I’m too lazy for that, but I’m pretty much satisfied, and to be satisfied is meaningful enough.”
I have learned to not ask for anything from anyone or wanting things to happen the way I want it, not either from God. My prayers are simple; breathing. I don’t want to exhaust myself by waiting for my wish to be granted, only, because I have spent my time waiting for it to happen that I forget everything else and it rarely happens.
To your question, “I find no evidence for the person I love to come back to me even how much I have hoped or wished. It doesn’t work that way, and there’s no other way to make it happen. To imagine her coming back is like being deluded with delusion. I guess God wants me to get real, even if the truth hurts, but at least it forced me to see the reality; jolted pain numbs me enough to lose any desire to wish for the impossible.”
So I keep my life simple with breaths and heartbeats, at least it’s possible enough to achieve peace without fault.