Just Deeply In Love

I don’t know. You have chosen what you have chosen. You don’t need to explain yourself or make excuses. I don’t hope for anything and certainly not promises that you can’t keep.

I have wait for your answers, but you are like a quiet mouse roaming around my mind with a voice that murmured through the night. I dance not to the rain, but to a raging storm inside my heart. I lack nothing that’s why I desire nothing to myself.

At times I wish you could open yourself up for me, but you are like a bud that needs time to bloom. I write sonnets and love letters with words of promises and vow, but the night owl and shining moon have magically dispelled the illusion, and my fantasy becomes like the Azure sky with no clouds to hinder the sun to shine. So I live in a fantasy world with Unicorns and Phoenixes. Why can I not fantasize about happy days and “they live happily ever after?”

Aah, it’s because you still can’t decide whether to settle with me in your heart since my love is like a fairy tale you thought was unreal, and that’s why you have left the pages unread without a glance the moment you felt you had to slain dragons and wolves to rescue me. Honey, you are the one who needs saving. I don’t climb mountains just to conquer your heart, and I don’t swim the ocean to just falls in love without the knowledge that I can defeat the wolves and dragons you have imagined.

I use my words to tickle your fantasy, and my eyes look deep into yours to see where your soul has bound itself to without the freedom to leap through faith. While I looked into the window of your soul, you have blinked and shied away from my gaze. How long shall I walk in your shoe for you to understand that I am considerate of your feelings?

I am not someone you can easily defeat because in my vocabulary the words “give up” doesn’t exist. I don’t know how to give up, that’s why I become so weary and tired, I exhaust myself to the extent where my limbs felt aching and constrained.

I remember how the jolts of electricity surge through my body when you touch my face lightly as a feather. My soul has following yours the moment I saw your light, the beauty of how you carry yourself. You are the light of a thousand suns, and I am at the bottom of the cliff hanging onto your shining rays.

What can I do now when winter settles in, and I sleep like there’s no tomorrow? What are night and morning? Because I have slept a thousand years, and now another thousand more, since the light you emit has blind my eyes. I live in darkness, and my heart is the walking stick to guide my way. One beat, follow the light, two beats jump over the gap, three beats slowly striving ahead.

I am not blind, just deeply in love.

a.a

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