The Death of Earthly Desires
Beloved Divine Mother,
I broke down in tears because I am overwhelmed by the way I have gone against myself.
Divine Mother, you know who I am, right? You understand that I love immensely and I am willing to let go of attachment to earthly desires so that my beloved will see the fruition of Heaven on Earth I am here to create.
There’s much pride in me, Cosmic Mother, and my patience seem to run short at the moment since everything I feel right now is nothing but despair and the only word I entertain myself with is endure.
Divine Mother, I am afraid I will lose myself again and forget how important I am, how worthy I am, and how loved I am, and all this because of my faith, faith in true love, in a fairy tale untold.
Mother, please, cradle me in your arms. Let me go back to your womb so I can rest there, just for this night, because tonight I feel the loneliness of the abyss I thought I had filled up with my beloved presence and my own.
I venture through the hallway of darkness again, looking for the light I thought was mine, but Divine Father God told me, everything outside myself is merely illusions. Only what’s within me is real.
Nothing real can be threatened.
Nothing unreal exists.
Herein lies the peace of God.
– A Course In Miracles
Thoughts that no one cares about my existence; who I am, what I do, what my abilities are or what I am here to do. No one is interested to know anything but their own lives and their interest, and then I shall not think that I matter for them, because right now I live in my world alone.
Whether I am here or go back home to Venus would not matter to anyone, since my existence is my own, whether I change other people’s lives or touch their hearts with the love of my own or the love of Divine Father God is nothing I think I need to be acknowledged.
It’s a burden Mother, to love in such a selfish way, to want to gain pleasure or acknowledgment for what I give.
How can I love my beloved better, Divine Mother? Does silence contain all the answers to mine questions?
I am tired Mother, can this fragile body of mine hold so much light? Can my heart not beat the drums of hopelessness, but crack open wider to let my Divine Love flow freely?
Miracle is my name. I am Miracle. But no one seems to believe in Miracles. Do they, Mother?
Spicy the twins told me, love is love, it can’t be measuring. Am I suppose to die each night to give birth to a new beginning? Shall I weep to rinse every impurity thought that crossed my mind and transmuted fear into love?
If that strengthen my beloved faith in herself and her divinity, then I am willing. I am ready, Divine Mother, let me die tonight to arise like a phoenix in a significant momentum of the sacredness within my heart when Divine Father embrace me by His warmth tomorrow morning.
I am letting go of the old to embrace the new, Mother. Be with me so I may not stray from my path of being a torchbearer, The Sacred Divine Feminine, and the initiate to holy living on planet Earth.
Hear my plea, Cosmic Mother, don’t leave me tonight.
Your humble and filial Daughter,
Miracle, The Seraph.