Before I even comprehend what it meant to have a twin flame I was very perplexed at how I didn’t understand your feelings that time. But it was also because I was wounded and hurt myself, and I could only see from the way my ego perceived your actions and words with fear. Fear of being rejected and not accepted for the love that I am, my gentleness and softness that I protected with all my might and thick armor.
Your wife has a delicate soul as you may know. And I do believe that you will remember that gentleness and softness inside yourself as well.
“Your feelings wrapped gently in your words
I ignored them with so much selfishness.
How can I love you in the way you want me to,
when I’ve looked past your feelings?
Is there any way I can make it up to you?
Is there any thing you desire me to do?
How can I love you better?
I want to make it up with every breath I take
with every moment I live my life.
How can I be me, if there was no YOU?
How can I experience anything without your existence?
Why is that Your absent makes me feel so unworthy?
Is it because I valued you so much
thus I put all my love in your existence.
And therefore, it’s the only way I would know,
that My existence is in Yours?
That none of us are unworthy
but our worthiness comes from our absent of each other;
Then we’ll merge and become One –
And that which is absent
is in reality always there?
The connection, the love we both share?
Is that our ONENESS?
Our whole and completeness?”
Ryder, I am very much in love right now. I keep thinking of her and desire to protect, guide, heal and stay by her side as long as possible, as long as she needs and wants me to stay. Somehow I have her in mind when I go about my days and realizing my dreams and construct my future. I know that what I say and do affect people around me and the collective consciousness, and that’s the reason why I want to be completely me in the future.
My responsibility to be a living example is important for everyone involved, and I am working diligently on staying as much awake as possible.
Right now, life has begun to take a different note, a clear and luminous one. And you know that this is what I always desired for myself, to be who I am. Even if I couldn’t put a fake smile on my face to please others, and people will misunderstand me for being prissy, depress or negative, but still, I am going to put a smile on my beloved’s face.
The treasure I buried deep inside my heart is now being dug up, and I am sharing it with everyone who comes across my path by living as an example in this material world.
My love, Anthu came and talked to me last week. He said he was proud of me. He asked me why I didn’t like chocolate, *Laughing.* That was his first question upon our first meeting. All I could answer was; it’s either too sweet or too bland or too bitter for me to consume it on a daily basis as most people do.
“Or is it because you don’t like children who work so hard on picking the cocoa plants, mom? Because you know they are using children to slave and do hard labor to earn money for survival.”
Ryder, Anthu is right also for that matter. I don’t like these traffickers who trick and use children to sell their hearts for some money to survive. Even if they work for money, but they get paid so little that it’s heart-wrenching.
I have a nagging feeling that human trafficking and slavery is still a big issue and people are still ignorant about it. My beloveds don’t even know that they are also slaving away with the way they are sometimes living with the thought that they have to make money for survival and not to make a life. And even if they desire to make a life, it’s hard for them to drop from the fear-based thinking into their hearts and live with a certainty that with each single breath, they are being provided.
The economic system is rotten and defect, not to mention the whole old-paradigm of the 3D world. Luckily we are all here to change that. And since I am the first wave of Starseed who is awake and aware at this moment, I am not shrinking back and live a small life.
I can’t bring Anthu to a chaos world without harmony, peace, and balance. My child is not going through what I went through as a child here on planet Earth. I’m not going to allow it to happen while I am still here. No one, adult or children deserve to be dim as worthless and incapable of being loved and respected.
Our completeness of ONENESS is the uttermost importance to set a new unconditional love and peace paradigm of 5D reality.
Ryder, I am in love, and I am willing to stay in love without demanding, and asking anyone to change for me. I am staying true to myself, and whatever may come my way, let me respond with love and strength. Living with integrity and being authentic to show humanity the way of caring deeply for another as one self.
I am living for you, our son, Anthu, and everyone else at the moment.
Your Queen of Paradise is here reigning and stand tall as a sovereign star-being. I am a profound seeker of peace, wherever I go, I reside within my Heart-Space Sanctuary peacefully while I wait with patience for you to wake up.
Beaming you with adoration and tender eyes,
Your beloved wife,
Miracle, The Seraphim.